bed knobs and booze shits

You know what one of the best things about life without alcohol is? Feeling tired, and doing something about it with no guilt whatsoever.

Guilt is such a fucker of an emotion anyway, and serves little purpose, if any. When I was drinking more booze than was good for me, I used to feel like I wasn't allowed to 'indulge' my tiredness, like it was all self-inflicted. And a lot of it was - remove the sludge and drudge of alcohol and hangovers, I generally recharge my batteries much fuller now, with less time. Feel bad for having had fun and booze the night before? The easiest way to forget about that is to have more wine and 'meh' times on the sofa.

Now, when I'm tired (and let's face it, we're navigating a pandemic, widespread financial uncertainty - thank you to my Patreon supporters please join my Patreon I love you -, changing political landscapes, climate crises and urgencies that are just being wilfully ignored because they're too scary to accept, isolation, lockdown, some of us have had covid and are still fighting through its aftershocks, some of us are terrified of catching it, losing our own health or family members - who ISN'T tired?!), I know it.

I know it's tiredness, not a hangover. I can usually tell if it's stress, overwhelm, anxiety or purely physical. And do you know what I can do? I can take myself off social media and all my screens (not a punishment! a treat!), and I can take myself to bed. I could do that when I was boozing too, of course, but it wouldn't be restorative, it'd be for survival. And accompanied by guilt, heightened anxiety, and a load of boozy sweats. Delightful, no? (And I haven't even started to talk about the booze shits, they were just mentioned for the delightful punny reference to Angela Lansbury's cult classic. You're welcome.)

Bin the booze for a bit, see how much better bed feels. You don't even have to sleep, there's plenty of other things you can do there that make you feel good (and which should also not bring about any feelings of guilt).

Love.

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